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Jack Wagner is a pro, and I'm not talking about his celebrity golf
skills. I remember not liking him at first, thinking he was corny and
took himself too seriously. Then I got it. As Jason Riley said in his
February 26 Wall Street Journal article, "While most of the cast looked
to be performing at the limits of their talent, Mr. Wagner, who brought
daytime soap experience to his role, seemed to just *act* like he was a
bad actor--his character would most wink at the viewer, and he was
forever smirking." Or, if I may paraphrase one of the best rules for
the MPTV Drinking game for Peter- "(take a drink when-) The Doc smirks
while saying how seriously sincere he is." I could go on and on about
how fun Wagner makes the show, his chemistry with Calabro, and how I
maybe grew to understand why all those chicks who pay hundreds of
dollars on Ebay for something he touched have the hots for him, but
without further ado...
- When Michael got the brilliant idea to join Peter on his camping
trip, and Peter was not happy, and right before he fell off the top of a
hill, he told Michael, "In fact, I think I feel another attack of rage
epilepsy coming on!" Also earlier in the episode, when he lost it and
started yelling at Michael and slamming him up against the wall in the
hospital, raving about, "You're like cancer, you CUT it and BURN it, but
it KEEPS coming BACK!"
- When Peter was first trying to get back together with Amanda, and
Jack Parezi had come back to harass her, there was a scene where he was
talking to her outside her office while Jack was sitting on the couch
inside. He stopped and asked, "...and who is that?" Amanda replied,
"That's my husband. Excuse me." and closed the door on his face. The
look on Peter's face was priceless.
- (Most of his best moments were in the 4th season) When Bobby Parezi
was back in town, and Michael left the office, saying he was going to
meet Bobby for lunch. Peter stopped and said, "Now there goes a
frightening picture."
- Also in the 4th season, when Kimberly seemed to be attracted to
Michael again, Michael was staying over at Peter's house. Peter was
trying to get Amanda back, and Michael, smirking, started talking about
Kimberly and how she was "maybe starting to give him signals." Peter got
a horrible look on his voice and said flatly, "That's not even mildly
amusing."
- The whole Peter-pretends-Taylor-is-Beth storyline gave me the creeps
at first, then got extremely hilarious (even though it probably wasn't
intentional) and entertaining. Peter suddenly got way more bizarre and
mean than usual. I laughed pretty hard at a scene where Taylor picked up
the phone at the condo and was happy to hear Peter calling from the
office. Without even saying hello, Peter ordered her to have his dinner
ready with his drink when he got home. Taylor started to babble on about
something and he cut her rudely off with, "I didn't call to chat, I
called to tell you what do. Now just do it." and hung up without further
ado, leaving her looking like, "what the...?" This was just so out of
nowhere I found it really funny.
- More recently, when a female patient was in Dr. Visconti's office
telling him about some horrible dream where her hair was on fire, and
Peter burst in and hastily escorted her out, saying, "OK, your hour's
up, time to go now, session's over!"
- And also from this season, when Peter of course overheard Amanda
making fun of Michael for being a stripper, had a good laugh at him, and
walked off singing "Addicted To Love"
- Also when Michael was staying over at Peter's, he and Amanda went
inside to talk, and he told Michael, who was standing there
half-dressed, "For God's sake, go inside and put some clothes on. You're
frightening the neighbors."
- In the 3rd season finale-- "There was a moment when I wanted to kill
you, Michael, but fortunately, that moment has passed."
- Finally, this is probably one of my top 5 Melrose lines, and one of
the things on Melrose I laughed my butt off the hardest at, when Sydney
was still a receptionist at Burns-Mancini and got flowers from Michael.
Kimberly leaned down and told her, "Here's a little tip, Syd. When
Michael send you flowers, it means he's cheating on you." Syd got
nervous, and asked Peter, who happened to be walking by, what sending
flowers to a woman meant to him. He replied,"I usually send them to a
woman as a token of my love and affection, or to show her how I can't
stop thinking about her." Syd smiled, relieved, and Peter started to
walk off, then stopped and said, "Unless Michael sends you the flowers,
which means he's probably cheating on you."
-Kitten With a Whip
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