Next we see a corner shot of a big shiny tree which turns out to be a courtyard shot of Melrose Place. The props department must have had to cut corners to get Heather Locklear a baby shower present. Upstairs in Amanda's apartment Kyle emerges from the bedroom in his bathrobe where he and Amanda discuss Taylor's "miscarriage" over coffee - he's obviously been taking notes regarding romantic conversations from Peter. Kyle attacks Amanda for telling Eric about his losing the Boston restaurant but Amanda pleads innocent and says it must have been someone else as she and Eric only discuss *her* business. For once it seems Kyle has a clue because he tells Amanda he thinks Eric is involved in the Boston buyout. I need to mention here that this plot line was so transparent that my boyfriend figured it out solely from watching the commercials for the show that FOX ran during Sunday's football game. Amanda defends Eric's innocence and leaves for work.

Michael, Jennifer and Craig enter Michael's office to meet with some Dr. Mosely guy who is so geeky looking he obviously won't be a regular on this show. Mosely has brought the prototype of the cauterizing glove which he demonstrates to Craig by using it on a raw steak. Everyone is excited about what a great medical invention this is and how much money they are going to make until they hit a snag: Michael wants to "get rich quick" and sell his idea immediately to a pharmaceutical company whereas Craig wants to start a business and make even more money than God (i.e. Bill Gates). He tells Michael, "No company, no deal" and walks out.

Megan goes to AWA to see Eric and tells him she's looking for a job. She explains what she lacks in job skills she more than makes up for with her "people skills" and what's a college degree when you have people skills, right? She goes on to say that she wants to have her own business someday and asks Eric to be her "mentor", which he gladly agrees to. They hug to celebrate Megan's new position when Eric sees Amanda walking towards his office. He grabs Megan by the collar and kisses her just in time for Amanda to walk in and see this little display of affection. Shocked, Megan waits for Amanda to leave and then lectures Eric on how the office is not the place for such behavior. Excuse me, but isn't this the same Megan that jumped into Michael's lap last season at his office and demanded sex?!? Begging forgiveness, Eric promises to "make it up to her" by taking her out to lunch.

Jennifer's got the night off and she's spending it wearing her new "Just Like Barbie" flower barrettes and dancing with Craig at - where else? - Upstairs. And I find it odd she'd want to spend her nights off at work because for most people I know the LAST place they'd be found on their day off would be work. They must serve underage drinkers there. She tells Craig the Wonder Dancer how Michael is manipulative (as if she's not) and tries to convince him that Michael is just using him for the money and now that the geeky guy has been paid for the prototype Michael has no more use for Craig. Craig says he doesn't care and will just find another investment opportunity and it's no wonder all his business ventures fail. Jen tries to convince Craig the only way for him to come out on top with a Mancini is to "have another Mancini on his side" so Craig, instead of asking for Jane's phone number, gives her 24 hours to change Michael's mind or he's "taking his money and leaving town - this time for good". He must have a call in to Hasselhoff about getting his old "Baywatch" job back.

Taylor - who seems to have finally found a hairbrush - is at work when Kyle runs in and shows her a letter he received from the landlord telling him from now on their lease is on a month-to-month basis. Taylor tells him she received a letter as well and Kyle shares his suspicions that Eric is behind all this. Taylor informs Kyle that, by putting on a slinky dress and high heels (an image I'd rather not imagine) when she went to pay the rent, she found out the name of the company that is buying the lease: Upper West Holding Company. She goes on to say that Bender, the landlord, is meeting his "contact" that evening at Bella Vista restaurant. When Kyle says he's going to check it out, Taylor insists on joining him "in order to take her mind off the miscarriage".

At the property settlement hearing for Sterling/Cooper the judge finds in favor of Lexi. Coop has an outburst and accuses Lexi of having her father call in some favors to make this judgement happen. Lexi seems to have forgotten this is LA and not SAVANNAH because her fake southern accent has magically returned. Coop asks Lexi how much more money she needs since she is already filthy rich and she replies by telling him the only way she could ever reach him was through his wallet. And why she would want to even touch him is beyond me. Coop decides it must have been either Michael or Peter who gave the records to Lexi so Peter, smooth guy that he is, blames it on Michael since Michael didn't show up for the hearing so I guess subpeonas don't have as much legal weight in California as they do in the rest of the United States. Coop is persuaded by Peter's words.

Jennifer is looking nearly naked in some ugly, gray nightie with spaghetti straps - complete with yet another set of flower barrettes - as she enters the lab to visit Mosely. She saunters in trying to be sexy and bats her eyes at the scientist who turns into putty because apparently he's never seen a real female up close. She asks to see the prototype gloves so he pulls out 3 and points out that the best one is also the one with a wiring defect. When Jennifer asks for an explanation "in layman's terms" he gives a comic turn by eerily telling her, "the glove will turn on its master." Pretending to be frightened by this information, Jennifer starts shaking and, in the process, spills a cup of water all over herself. Poor geek boy tries to help her clean it up by handing her his clip on tie but she insists she needs a towel. So, while Mosely runs to the bathroom to get her one, Jennifer quickly switches the labels on the gloves making the good one bad and vice-versa.

Coop is sitting in Michael's office when Michael enters and finds him there. Coop accuses Michael of giving the financial records to Lexi but Michael denies it because, after all, he really is innocent this time. Naturally Coop doesn't believe him and confronts Michael about the cauterizing glove which he found out about when he found the file on it conveniently sitting on Michael's desk. Michael insists he didn't steal Coop's idea but, instead, that it was "out there floating around" somewhere. Coop's attitude suddenly changes as he tells Michael he supports him because they're "partners" and that's what partners do but his wish that Michael "gets what he deserves" sounds ominous enough that even Michael picks up on it as Coop exits the office.

Kyle and Taylor are playing Junior Joe Spy Detective at the Bella Vista restaurant where they're waiting to see who Bender's contact is. While they wait, Taylor informs Kyle that Upper West Holding Company is also the company responsible for buying out the Boston restaurant. She then plays her "miscarriage pity card" when Kyle spots Amanda sitting a few tables away by herself. He tells Taylor they need to get out of there before they get caught so Taylor suggests they sneak out the back door. Too late - Amanda sees them but before she can chase after them Eric and Megan show up at her table for dinner. Eric immediately excuses himself to go speak with Bender and get the contracts for Kyle's restaurants.

Coop is sitting in the dark in his apartment desperately awaiting a new storyline when the phone rings. It's Mrs. Shaw and her "Kimberly photo collection" calling. She warns Coop how Michael had a "hold over Kimberly", everything is a game to him and how he will ruin Coop. When Coop starts rattling off all the bad things Michael's done to ruin his life, Mrs. Shaw advises him, "We shouldn't dwell on the bad things in our life; we should eliminate them." She tells him she'll "be in touch" as she hangs up the phone.

See Amanda. See her bed. See the leopard print sheets that have been there since Peter and Billy and God knows who else. Kyle comes in and Amanda gives him the cold shoulder as she rolls over and says, "goodnight".

Next we see Peter waking up in a hideously striped bed but at least he changes his sheets. Lexi is fully dressed and leaving. She explains she's going back to Cleveland because that's where her home is, it's where her friends and family are, and it's where her charity work is. As he chases after her outside he gives her the same "We've Got Something Special Doesn't That Mean Something" speech he gave Amanda a couple seasons ago. Lexi tells him she'll "never forget him" and drives off.

Amanda Woodward Advertising and cheese - how appropriate for Melrose Place! Sam enters Billy's office with a large cheese snacks sign that looks like it was made by a 2-year-old. Billy tells her how wonderful it looks and then they kiss which is when they realize they can hide behind the sign and fool around. Billy tells Sam he "has something for her" and hands her a ring box with her engagement ring in it. She opens it and puts the ring on herself (isn't that *his* job?) and as they grope some more behind the cheese sign we discover Sam color coordinates her clothes to match her underwear. Amanda enters the office giving Sam barely enough time to duck and hide, much less put her shirt back on, so Billy stuffs it down the back of his pants as he talks to Amanda about her love life. She confesses she thinks Kyle is sleeping with Taylor and apparently, when we weren't looking, Kyle and Billy became really good friends because Billy tells Amanda what a "stand up" guy Kyle is and how he would never cheat on her. Her fears calmed, Amanda rises to leave but pauses at the door and says, "Oh, by the way Sam. When I said we have a relaxed dress code here, I meant you should wear more than just your bra." With that she leaves and Sam and Billy go back to molesting each other behind Mr. Cheese.

Michael is in a meeting with some stuffy looking executives from St. George's Pharmaceutical Company to demonstrate his new glove. Michael asks for a volunteer who puts the glove on and promptly gets electrocuted when it short circuits. Everyone is outraged, Mosely is embarassed and Michael is confused as he angrily fires Mosely and storms out. Jennifer chases after him and tells him his only option now is to "go back to the original plan" and go into business with Craigmeister. So I guess "Baywatch" will just have to wait.

Megan is going to someone's hotel room - are things already so bad that she's falling back on *this* people skill? No, she's just going to see Eric for a late night business meeting. Upon entering, she immediately proceeds to lecture him on the difference between dating and business which is ironic when you consider she used to make a living combining the two. Megan goes on to say that, while she's thrilled at this magnificient job opportunity, she's not going to sleep with Eric to get it. Eric lets her know he's not interested in her so she asks if he's gay because Lord knows if a guy isn't attracted to her then he MUST be gay! He replies that he's not gay, he just "needs somebody on his arm when the occasion calls for it", and then suggests they get to work.

Amanda arrives at Kyle's office carrying a picnic basket to surprise him with when she discovers Kyle sitting with Taylor on the sofa. Outraged, she storms out like a jealous teenage girlfriend so Kyle jumps up and runs after her. Amanda confronts them about their dinner at the Bella Vista so Kyle tells her about the restaurant takeovers and how he thinks Eric is behind them. He insists Eric wants Amanda but Amanda doesn't buy any of it and calls him paranoid as she walks away.

Back at 4616, Megan bumps into Amanda in the courtyard who asks about her love life with Eric. Megan informs her that it is just business between her and Eric and then confides how she thinks Eric is really just using her to make another woman jealous. Megan confesses that she was kinda using Eric to make Michael jealous so Amanda, being helpful as only she can be, replies, "Well, two of Michael's ex-wives are dead but if you want to call Jane I do have her number in Chicago." Megan wisely walks away while Amanda just stands there and smirks.

Oh no, not *another* redhead! Oh wait, it's just Mrs. Shaw hovering outside Wilshire Memorial. Luckily, Coop sees her and grabs her before she goes in the door. Annoyed, he asks what she's doing there and reminds her she could blow his cover. She explains "they've got to get Michael" but he orders her to go back to Ohio and wait for his next move. She reluctantly agrees but reminds him she's just a phone call away.

Megan is packing up to leave Burns-Mancini-Cooper when Michael approaches her and reminds her of her lack of job skills. When she tells him she's already secured a job with Eric, Michael comments how 900-numbers are advertising and then twists the knife a little deeper by stating, "once a hooker, always a hooker". This sends Megan over the edge and we see that she herself has also been through the "No Victims Camp" as she tightly grabs Michael's still-injured hands and brings him to his knees in pain. She tells him never to call her a hooker again or she'll kill him. With that, she releases her grip and walks out.

Amanda is at Eric's where they're sharing drinks and discussing Kyle and his theory that Eric is behind the restaurant takeovers. Amanda baits him into confessing his love for her, after which he kisses her. Amanda replies that she loves him too, but only as a friend and then demands to know if Kyle's suspicions are true. Eric admits he's behind the takeovers which angers Amanda so she heads for the door. Eric grabs the wine bottle and nearly takes her head off with it as he hurls it at the door. He shouts that the million dollars he loaned her didn't come with "no strings attached" and then tells her to make a choice: her agency or Kyle. "That's easy," she replies. "I choose Kyle." He threatens to take everything away from her, including Kyle, but Amanda remains calm, cool and collected as she tells him to give it his best shot. With that she walks out and it's only after she's safely out of his sight that she lets her true shock and exhaustion show.

Lexi saunters into the courtyard - she isn't moving in too is she? No, she's only here to collect her first check from Coop before she goes to the airport. Coop leaves her standing outside while he goes to write the check so she can see witness firsthand some of the insanity that is Melrose Place. Michael, Craig and Billy emerge from Billy's apartment discussing and debating the re-naming of and advertising for the "Mancini Glove". While they continue their conversation, Megan comes out of her apartment en route to the laundry room, see Michael, and tells him not to talk to her. As if all this isn't enough of a circus, Peter runs in and professes his undying love for Lexi in front of everyone including Coop, who is back from writing the check. "What did you just say to my ex-wife?" he asks. Peter repeats himself, Lexi tells him she feels the same way and could never leave him and they kiss while everyone else blankly looks on.

--written by Kate and Stacie

Eric informs Kyle that they have two weeks to vacate so Kyle lunges at Eric; Eric tells Amanda he'll drop everything if she'll sleep with him; Michael tells Megan "Kimberly is back" as we see a broken photograph of Michael and Kimberly with a knife through it and then a gun being fired.