As always, the show starts with clips from last week's episode which I, personally, was very grateful for since I missed last week's show. I noticed that Eve had a different hairstyle last week so she must be taking pointers from either Mood Hair or Loreal Woman. I also got a chance to see Megan and Michael fall through the roof of Amanda's apartment which was pretty entertaining and is exactly where this week's episode picks up. Covered in plaster and wearing nothing but their skivvies, Megan and Michael scramble to standing after landing on Amanda's bed where she was sitting with Jane eating ice cream and having girl talk. Suddenly, almost the entire cast is in the room with them as twenty different conversations take place at once. After Michael checks to see that Megan is ok, our attention is drawn to Wet-Baby-Lip-Boy who is there to whine about the fact that Michael and Megan broke into his apartment to get up on the roof which must be some kind of housing code violation in itself. I mean, we're expected to believe that complex only has one apartment with a fire escape? After they rebuilt half of it when Kimberly blew it up? Megan yells at him about his bathroom activities with Lexi and shouts to noone in particular, "You should've seen them - they were rutting like pigs!" which is exactly the same thing Jane told Billy about Alison and Jake a few seasons back and it was such a ridiculous sounding thing to say back then I guess the writers felt the need to remind us of it again. Jane and Michael then start fighting as Jane tells Michael she was considering coming back to him but not anymore which, at the moment, seems to be just fine with Michael. Ryan, not content to have the attention taken away from him, makes a rude comment about Megan's history as a hooker which prompts Michael to punch him in the jaw. The good doctor then grabs Megan and rushes her out of the apartment while G.I. D'oh - who has yet to say or do anything - feels the need to actually participate in this scene by holding his baby brother back instead of letting him run out after them. In the back of the crowd, now standing in Amanda's kitchen and still wearing the non-hideous part of her wedding dress, Jane says quietly, "I never should have come back to this town." Queen Amanda replies, "You might have a very good point there."

Downstairs at Megan's apartment, Michael is saying "Easy, easy" and I'm not sure if he's referring to the leg she's now limping on or the fact it took so little to get her willing to sleep with him again. He tries to pick things up where they left off before their little diversion but Megan explains she was drunk before but now she's sober and, therefore, isn't interested and I'll have to remember that the next time I'm out with my friends and one of them has had too much to drink. The secret to instant sobriety, kids, is taking off your clothes and falling through the roof of a building. Megan goes inside so Michael turns to leave but doesn't get 2 paces away when he's blindly slugged by Lip-Boy McBride who knocks Michael to the ground. "You know what you are, Mancini?" Ryan starts. "You're that crap that washes up on the beach after a storm. Syringes and specimen bottles. Waste, Mancini, medical waste." He then tells Michael to stay away from him because he's such a big, tough, macho man and Michael seems to echo my sentiments as he brushes himself off, stands and replies, "That's fine, caveman". Ahhh, another nickname for Ryan. Michael tells Thor that he's just angry because he knows he "blew it" with Megan. Ryan says nothing and walks into his apartment. Jane storms out of her apartment with the hideous part of her wedding gown, marches straight to the BBQ grill, puts her dress IN the grill, douses it with lighter fluid and sets it on fire. She warns Michael to stay away from her or she'll "set him on fire too" and does anyone else realize this is the VERY FIRST TIME we've seen Jane be even remotely evil since her return? Ryan walks out of his apartment to witness the bonfire as Megan watches from her window. Also present from their window are Kyle and Amanda who tells Doy Boy, "This place is out of control."

The following morning, Pool Boy is cleaning the pool and I only hope after Lexi's naked body went swimming in there a few weeks ago he's done something to disinfect it as well. God only knows what that woman is carrying around with her. Inside Peter's apartment, RuEve is dancing around singing while she attempts to cook breakfast and I noticed some kind of square tattoo on the inside of her right arm that looks like she got branded on a cattle farm. Her attempts fail, however, when the smoke detector goes off and she turns to see her breakfast creation on fire. Peter runs out to answer her cries for help and puts out the fire because Eve is obviously too stupid to know what to do except whine. They open the front door to let the smoke out which Amanda takes as an open invitation to stick her nose in and bait the happy couple by asking how they slept through the previous evening's show out in the courtyard. She tells Peter to get the details from his partner and adds, "By the way, if there's any damage in here you guys are responsible - have a good day!" before trotting off. Ru apologizes for being such a lousy cook but Mr. Sunshine tells her it's not a problem because he'll just take her out more often so I guess Kyle's will be seeing even more of them than they already do. The phone rings, which Peter answers to discover his father in Texas died. He tells Eve he needs to fly down to take care of his father's affairs since Peter is the only family the old buzzard had left. Ru offers to go with to which Peter replies, "What's the rush - he's already dead." So much for Mr. Sunshine.

Kyle and a couple carpenters come marching into Ryan's apartment en route to the fire escape to fix the hole in the roof. The 2 nameless men do their part as extras by walking through the room and, most certainly, into TV history. It's just a matter of time before one of them ends up on "Friends". Kyle then turns his attention to Wet Lips and tells him, "You done it good this time." Ryan defends himself by saying how Michael broke the door jam when he broke into his apartment but Kyle is more interested in knowing if what Megan said about Lip Boy and Mood Hair is true. Again, Ryan tries to defend himself but Doy Boy informs him Lexi is only using him to get to Amanda and how he came up with that conclusion is beyond me but, hey, the guy isn't working with a full deck so I guess I'll let it slide. "It's my life!" Ryan retorts so G.I. D'oh gets in his brother's face and hisses, "If it affects my wife - if it hurts her - I am going to be so in your life you aren't going to be able to piss without company, you understand?" and storms out.

Megan is in her office boxing up her stuff when Lexi walks in and asks about the resignation Megan submitted. Hooker Girl explains how Mood Hair hurt her so Lexi jumps to the defensive explaining, "You pushed Ryan away... that was an open invitation to move in." And she wonders why she has no friends. She goes on to explain how her affair with Ryan was "never serious" but Megan could care less and tells her, "You can keep him - I'm through with both of you."

Michael and Dr. Visconti are walking down the hospital corridor as they discuss the exciting events that happened during the previous 24 hours. Dr. Wet Blanket suggests Michael and Jane sit down together in a room and talk but Michael isn't interested. A man approaches them with a subpeona so Michael assumes it's from Amanda since she's sticking him with the roof repair bill. However, it's divorce papers from Jane. After reading aloud all the things she's sueing him for, Michael says the only room he'll see Jane in is a courtroom.

At AWA, Lexi is wandering the halls when Amanda stops her and tells her she's holding Mood Hair personally responsible for the damage to her roof. Lexi explains how she and Ryan are lovers when Ryan himself magically appears. Lexi asks if she can have a word with him but Ryan tells her, "I've got 2 words for you - get and lost... Our sick little relationship is over." Amanda chimes in, "Worse than that, we don't validate. You'll have to pay your own parking." Lexi sniffs, "Kiss my ass" and walks out. "Hmmm, there's an ugly thought," Amanda quips and then orders Ryan into her office. She asks him why she shouldn't fire him so he calmly hands her a stack of files on her desk and explains how he brought in 6 accounts in the past 2 months while all she did was bring in Poseable Malibu Alex Bastian. He continues that she'd be lost without him and a whole bunch of other crap that I distinctly remember Billy rattling off not too long ago. He then suggests they forget this little conversation and breezes out the door as Jane comes dragging herself in. Amanda tells her Alex Bastian took his business elsewhere which means Jane is fired but before she can get another word out, Ryan sticks his head in and tells her, "Jane stays too or I'll take my accounts elsewhere." Amanda concedes but tells them they're both "month to month, just like your leases" which seems pretty unbelievable in both aspects. I mean, what kind of employment stipulates you work there month to month and, Amanda being the Queenie she is, doesn't she have tenants sign legally binding leases when they move in? But I digress. Outside her office, Jane thanks Ryan for his help and I swear I almost saw a spark between them as he tells her, "When you've lost everything, you don't want to lose your job, too."

Woohoo! It's time to visit Golf World in Twitty, Texas and no I'm not making this up. Peter and Eve pull up to what looks like a circus trailer or one of those places on the side of the road where they sell weird stuff like canned road kill or old tires. Turns out it's where Peter's father lived and the inside of the trailer isn't much better. Mrs. Livingston must have taken the day off. Amongst clutter and beer bottle caps, RuEve finds a picture of Peter's mother. Peter explains that she left shortly after he was born and died a couple years later in a car accident. He then points out a trophy and says it's the only tournament his father ever won for being "Greatest Texas Amateur" and now I'm wondering if he was an amateur golfer or an amateur at housekeeping. "He wasn't bitter, he was mean to the bone," Peter sighs so Eve asks if he was proud of Peter because any father would most certainly be impressed with a son who's been imprisoned repeatedly, attempted murder, lost his license more than once, lied, deceived, manipulated, arranged kidnappings and God only knows what else. Peter explains, "He was a tough man to impress."

This next scene is so redundant and annoying I'm going to speed through it as quickly as possible to make the pain stop. Michael chases Jane into her apartment yelling about the damages she's listed in her divorce papers. An argument soon follows about their first wedding where she stood him up and their second wedding into which Michael was "bamboozled" into marrying her. The topic of Malibu Alex then comes up and we've all been here so many times it's pointless to even reiterate the conversation. Jane pushes Michael out of her apartment telling him to "move out of the facility" as if it's some kind of mental institution or prison or something and actually, when you think of it, it kinda is. Michael refuses since, after all, it is the only apartment complex available in all of LA.

Back in Twitty, Peter is hitting golf balls on the driving range when the screen switches to black and white and suddenly we aren't in Kansas anymore. He remembers a time when he was about 11 or 12 and his drunken father was yelling at him to keep hitting balls until he got it right. Young Peter stands there crying so Beer Dad gets on his son for crying and then says that's the reason his mother left. Eve's voice brings him back to present day as she asks if he wants to talk about it. Peter angrily informs her there's nothing to talk about and they're leaving first thing in the morning.

Sure enough, the following morning, Peter and Eve arrive home to 4616 where Peter says he's leaving immediately for work. RuEve suggests he take a couple days off but Peter compares his father's death to that of an unknown patient and says "his chart is closed". Deep. Peter leaves and Amanda comes in to talk to Eve who tells Blondie all about Peter's dead father and how Peter "came from nothing". Eve insists Peter needs to talk about it but Amanda tells her it's best to stay out of his history because that way he'll stay out of their's.

Megan is reading the job section of the newspaper at Kyle's when Ryan approaches her. He apologizes for being the butthead he is and for what he said to her the other night. "I wish I could take it back," he tells her but Megan coldly tells him he can't and leaves.

Back at the hospital, Michael is now walking the corridor spewing all kinds of ridiculous damages to his lawyer for his countersuit against Jane. The lawyer informs him that he doesn't stand a chance of winning and suggests he and Jane sit down in a room and talk. Michael refuses, even when Peter approaches and suggests the same thing. Turning his attention to his partner, Michael tells him he'll need a deposition from Peter but Peter urges him to reconsider his whole lawsuit before proceding.

That evening, Michael is in the apartment laundry room when Jane comes down. Since neither one of them are willing to move out, she suggests they follow some kind of laundry schedule to avoid running into each other. I wonder if she'll also factor in things like a pool schedule or a schedule for going up on the roof. They get into another fight about Alex when Jane throws the photo album of their recent wedding pics at him. She then confesses that she kissed Alex before their wedding but defends her actions with, "It was just a kiss!" As their argument continues, Amanda and Kyle return home and hear the loud bickering going on. As a solution, Amanda walks around and locks the laundry room door. Jane and Michael beat on the door shouting for help for all of about 5 seconds before giving up. "No one can hear us," Michael says. "They're all behind closed doors" which is a joke in itself when you consider just how damned nosy everyone in that complex is and how their windows and/or blinds are ALWAYS open but again I digress. Downstairs, Jane sits on the counter so Michael offers her a blanket to keep warm with. In one fell swoop Jane grabs a broom, cracks it over her leg and waves the broken end in Michael's direction warning him, "Stay away from me or I'll kill you."

RuEve is in bed wearing a nightie that reminds me of a bathing suit I had as a child over 20 years ago when she wakes up and discovers Peter not in the bed with her. She wanders out to the living room where she finds Peter sitting in the dark going through a box of his father's belongings. He tells her he "doesn't want to be like his dad" and then tearfully asks Eve to marry him. She gladly accepts.

The following morning finds Kyle and Amanda sleeping on the floor in the living room when Eve and Peter come a'knocking. They tell them they're planning to go to Oakhurst to elope and ask Amanda and Kyle to "stand up for them". Hearing the name "Oakhurst" puts a panicked expression on Amanda's face as she and Eve exchange anxious glances but she says she and Doy Boy will gladly go with them.

Downstairs in the laundry room, Michael and Jane are asleep on separate counters talking about all Michael's previous marriages and also bringing up any new viewers up to speed in case they missed Jane's miscarriage, Michael's affair with Kimberly, Jane's affair with her divorce lawyer who Michael then setup with a call-girl friend of Sydney's, and his subsequent marriage to a blackmailing Sydney. Amanda walks in and asks if they made up but they both agree they are even more devoted to their divorce than they were before. "I give up - you 2 whackos deserve each other!" Amanda spouts. Jane tells Michael, "I'll see you in court" and storms out.

Kyle and Amanda are driving down a dirt road right behind Peter and Eve when they all pull into a dive called the "Halfway House Cafe". Who names these places anyway? Peter says he's lost so I guess we're supposed to believe a man actually stopped to ask directions. So much for a "more realistic" show. The 2 men go inside leaving Amanda and Eve outside talking about how dangerous it is for them to be seen in Oakhurst. Amanda asks, "Are you going to see her while you're there?" and Eve says she's thinking about it since she might not get the chance again. I don't know who they're talking about yet so don't ask...

I guess Peter figured out how to read a map or follow directions or something because now it's evening and our happy foursome is in some ritzy place talking about the wine cellar and drinking another bottle of champagne. Apparently Doy Boy has been spending too much time with Lush Mood Hair Woman. However, instead of drinking themselves into oblivion, the couples decide to retire to their rooms but not before Amanda makes a point of telling Eve she'll see her "AT 10".

At the Upstairs, Swamp Boogie Queen is playing music that sounds like the Grateful Dead crossed with Janis Joplin. The lead singer is dancing around the stage showing everyone her midriff when Megan comes in, sits at the bar and orders a Cosmopolitan. Belly Button Girl continues doing her thing on stage shrieking and gyrating her hips when she spots Ryan in the crowd and pulls him up on stage with her. The 2 start some sexy dancing which apparently angers Megan as she and her drink leave. Lip Boy notices but continues dancing.

Amanda and Kyle are in bed asleep when Amanda quietly sneaks out of bed and changes into her clothes. Kyle wakes up and says nothing as he watches Amanda walk out into the hallway, meet up with Eve and leave the building. He must dress in record time as we next see him driving a few car lengths behind Amanda and Eve and if I were half as paranoid as those 2 I'm sure I'd notice my own husband's car following me, especially given the probablity that car is most likely Amanda's. "Where are you going?" Kyle wonders aloud. I dunno Doy Boy - why don't you keep following them and find out.

Megan and her drink are now down at the bar in Kyle's when Lexi approaches her and sits down. She apologizes for being the Mood Hair Woman she is and begs for Megan's forgiveness, adding that Hooker Girl is the only friend she has and, without her, Lexi is "morally bankrupt". There's a news flash. Lexi whines, "You could help me to be a better person" to which Megan replies, "What - the Pope's not available?" The 2 women make up and Megan agrees to come back to work because "Ryan isn't worth quitting my job over." She then lists her requirements: no lies, no manipulating and she gets to be a Vice President. Lexi is all too happy to promote her because, after all, the less experience you have in business the higher you should be on the corporate ladder, right?

Amanda and Eve finally get to their destination which turns out to be a nursing home that obviously has no limits on visiting hours since it must be close to 10:30pm at this point. Outside the building Kyle watches through the window as they check in and go to see whoever it is they're going to see. They walk down a hall so Kyle walks around the outside of the building to witness them walking into the room of an old, bedridden woman who both Eve and Amanda happily embrace. Shortly thereafter they leave and Kyle peers out from his hiding place behind the side of the building. Once they're gone, Kyle goes into the old woman's room to continue his private investigation. Keep in mind he's got that short, spikey hair and is wearing jeans and a black leather jacket and it's late at night in the room of a bedridden, geriatric patient in a nursing home. No, he's no threat. The woman is asleep so Kyle picks up a framed photo sitting on her dresser to see a young Eve and Amanda in cheerleader outfits. The woman wakes up and begins to get hysterical as she says, "You're one of them!" Kyle tries to calm her down and explain but the woman yells, "My granddaughter spent 15 years in prison - she paid for her mistake!" Kyle tries to get clarification on that statement but the woman pushes her panic alarm and a nurse appears. G.I. D'oh Investigator Super Sleuth sheepishly says he "took a wrong turn" and quietly leaves.

The following morning, Kyle is finishing breakfast in his room while Amanda gets ready for the wedding by putting on one of the most hideous outfits I've ever seen in the history of this show. Not even Sydney would be caught in this outfit and she's dead. Kyle says he woke up in the middle of the night and saw Amanda wasn't there and asks where she went. Queenie lies that she and Eve found an all-night pizza place and went there. There's a knock at the door and it's Peter and Eve who wants to borrow Amanda to help her with her wedding dress. Peter opts to get dressed there and after the women leave, he and Kyle shake hands and agree to be friends.

Jane is at work on the phone with the doctor and it appears they aren't giving her very good news as they schedule another appointment with her for the next day. Megan enters, sits down, and apologizes for the whole thing with Michael taking full responsibility for all of it. Jane is obviously preoccupied so Megan asks what's on her mind. Through tears, Jane tells her she found a lump on her breast and has to have it checked out. Her chances of having cancer are 50/50. Megan holds her as she cries.

Kyle and Peter are having "man talk" as they get dressed and adjust ties and such. Doy Boy asks if Peter is nervous about getting married but Peter tells him Eve is "the right woman" and they talk some more about true love and really this scene is pretty pointless except for the fact Kyle clues Peter in to the fact that Amanda and Eve were supposedly at a pizza joint the night before.

Outside where the wedding is to take place, Peter gets a phone call from Mood Hair who is being uncharacteristically sweet. She tells him she loves him and knows he's out of town because of his father's death. Peter tries to tell her the real reason he's out of town but Lexi won't let him speak and tells him they'll talk when he gets home. With that she hangs up the phone.

Good ol' Julie is back and as she passes by Lexi's office, Mood Hair calls her in to ask how far away Yosemite is. Julie informs her it's about 5 hours by car "but only an hour by plane". So now she has a private jet? For someone who's supposed to be in jail for a fraudulent marriage she sure is doing pretty well don't you think?

Peter is trying to call someone on the phone, presumably Lexi, when the preacher comes over to tell him it's time for the wedding. "This call can wait," Peter tells him as he walks away with him.

Megan and Jane are walking to the AWA elevator when Michael appears and starts in on Jane for the umpteenth time about their problems and if someone doesn't shut him up soon I'm going to be forced to scream. Jane tells him, "Fine, you win" which Michael takes as some kind of trick or ploy suggested to her by her lawyer. Megan pulls Dr. Idiot aside and tells him to leave Jane alone because she has a "personal problem that requires all her attention". She can't divulge any more information as she's been "sworn to secrecy" but she seems to get her point across.

Eve and Amanda are putting the finishing touches on Eve's dress and hair. Amanda leaves to go check on the wedding preparations which leaves the door open for Kyle to enter. He tells her he knows all about her late night excursion the night before and that she spent 15 years in prison. "Did you kill someone?" he asks a frightened Eve but, before she can answer, Amanda reappears and tells him, "No. We both did."

--written and edited by Stacie

Eve tells Kyle she just wants to "go on with her life and marry Peter" but Kyle demands to know "what's going on"; Jane's biopsy news is apparently not good and she turns to Michael for comfort; Peter threatens Lexi by reminding her how he had Amanda kidnapped; Amanda tells Kyle she wants to have a baby.