Weasel Boy Weekly - September 14, 1998

for
September 14, 1998

Further Secrets Of Matt's Diary (or "The RETURN Of WEASEL BOY!!!")

YES.. it's really me... spelling errors and all! Sorry it's been so many many moons since we last talked, but I was kidnapped by a bunch of bumbling idiots who kept asking where the microfilm was... never mind. Last night I had a seance and Matt spoke to me from beyond the Grave... us homos tend to do that sort of thing alot... ANYWAY, he told me all sorts of things that he had in his Diary, but they only an hour... so here is a short list of things they had to omit from Matt's Diary...

Alison used to tell Matt of the horrible dreams she had where she gets killed and goes to hell, having to spend eternity with a bunch of shallow lawyers, one of whom dances with invisible babies.
during the energy crisis of the early nineties, TAYLOR made some extra cash orally siphoning gas from parked cars.
Matt's nickname at the strip club was "Wee Willy Winky"
Kyle used to have normal eyes, but stared too long at a record going right round, baby, right round.
Peter's big fantasy is to have sex with a woman who tells him that he's a way better singer than Rick Springfield. (If you get this last one, you're WAY too old to be watching Melrose Place. Shame on you.)
Coop got his name after a very unfortunate incident with a bunch of chickens in Alabama.
Megan and Marilyn Manson are on a first name basis with the same implant surgeon.
in high school, they used to taunt Jane by calling her "the underarm girl"
and finally...
Michael, Kyle, Peter, Jake... Billy... Matt had them all... and says he was better than them.

hugs and dishes...
luv WB