WBW - May 20, 1996

Weasel Boy Weekly
for
May 20, 1996

Year End Pre-exam Melrose Place Study Notes

Ok, Children, another year has gone by, and before we let you go home for summer vacation, let's all make sure our year at Melrose High has been a fruitful one..

here's a list of things we learned on Melrose place and alt.tv.melrose-place

Poor People and Crooks die in either Car crashes or falls from high buildings
Rich People Drown
There is only ONE hospital in Southern California
There are only five Doctors at a hospital
There is only ONE doctor, One nurse and three guards (who are required to be totally gullible and brainless) at mental institutions.
Plastic surgery makes you resemble a BATMAN villan
Old people should not wear spandex
Hetersexual men and women jump from bed to bed to bed and forget who they've done
Gay man don't have dicks
All Parent/Child relations are twisted
A swim in a pool cures paralasis
People will forgive you for trying to kill them, and in some cases, they'll marry you to keep you out of jail.
Blindness just goes away without warning in a second or two.
Ugly people don't live west of Denver.
Tupperware ain't cheap.
Red heads are always fashion victims
The only straight men in the fashion world are just still in the closet
There are no gay bars in Loa Angeles
Macho Joe was anything but
Beautiful and Charming Karen lives in the dark ages
Joey Lawrence has more fans out there than we would have thought
Only one cash register is required for a bar
The older, the bitterer
It's not really cheating if you just lie there and let them do all the work
Couches are light weight and very flamible
The June Cleaver look still works
It takes a talented actress to be a gun toteing cult girl and a loose-meat counter girl the same season.
If you're lucky, you'll just wake up with beautiful hair
Public intoxication is still fun
Never get in car/boat/plane with anyone who's not in the opening credits
Parkinson's disease is just a minor inconvienience
The A team still hasn't gone away from public memory
Some people have no sense of humor
and finally,
Carrie rotted in Hell... Richard is just a pale imitation

Love

WEASEL BOY

have a good summer everybody!